Dream Home

I always figured that if you were going to wish for something, there's no sense in being cheap about it. A few months ago, the news was showing an old Titan missile complex for sale. Living underground has always appealed to me, and I thought that this would make a super dig if I had the scratch to do it right.

Just recently, I started thinking about it again, and looked around the interwebs a bit. I found a old layout of just such a complex. Wow, this was more than I had expected. But hey, I'm wishing here, right?

What is showing here are three major sections of the silo. I can find use for all of them. I'm going to start here with the actual silo itself. First off, I don't want the missile. In its place I want a floor elevator. I'd have a large garage/barn type building over the silo built. I'd use the silo as a vehicle storage & workshop. Typically, I'd drive my car/truck/trailer into the "barn". From there, the floor would lower into the silo and stop at whatever level I want to to keep that particular vehicle.

Having multiple workshops there (lower levels) makes it fairly easy to move equipment into, and out of the silo. I would have a woodworking level, electronics level, chemistry level, and a general vehicle mechanics level. There would probably be others, too. I just can't think of them at the moment. Hmm, maybe a couple of levels devoted to keeping various parts and junk that I might find useful later. I'm a bit of a pack-rat, too.



This center section has me a bit stumped as to what I can do with it. The tall section with all the stairways obviously has an surface elevator, so that will probably prove useful. Maybe I could use it to move visiting guests into my complex. It might also be useful if I converted it into guest rooms. One to a floor. That looks like it will make three additional guest quarters.

The section behind it is where I would put the kitchen and utility areas. With the space involved, it would be one helluva kitchen. There's still lots of space for the washer and dryer.

This last area is going to be my main living quarters. And it won't be quite as spartan as being shown here. The top floor is going to be the master bedroom, complete with walk-in closets and a full bathroom, shower, and whatever else I can put in there.

The center floor I may divide into two areas. The living room would take half of the floor, and the other half is going to be my theater.

The lowest floor is going to be a bit hidden. I don't want friends and family wandering down there. At least, not uninvited. This is going to be my library and command center. Hey, if I'm going to be this elaborate, I'm going to have all kinds of security cameras and anti-personnel defense set up, too.

These floors will be accessible through a central elevator. There will also be a stairway winding around the outer wall.

I'm not going to go into the water, power, data, and sewage. I don't wish to think about them at the moment. In my dream house, all of these things already exist and work perfectly.

Multi-Function Watches

I like multi-function LCD watches. The more functions, the better I like them. I still have one of those Timex Data-Link watches. That watch allowed me to synchronize appointments, contact phone numbers, and alarms. Plus, I could also upload various mini applications. And this is what got me to thinking. One of those applications was a count-down timer. You know, you set the watch for 10 minutes, and 10 minutes later the alarm goes off.

If you look at multi-function watches, one of the functions you will invariably find is the stopwatch. Now I understand that a stopwatch is a useful feature if you have need of it. But come on, how many of you that have the stopwatch function ever actually use it? I tell you, I've got a greater need for the count-down timer than anything else. I don't need to know how long an event takes. I need to know how long until an event happens...

1. My eBay auction I'm bidding on ends in 2 hours.
2. I need to move the lawn sprinkler in 30 minutes.
3. "Back To The Future" starts at 4pm. (Okay, that's more of an alarm thing)
4. Pick up the wife from Bed, Bath and Beyond in 40 minutes.
5. The parking meter has 30 minutes on it. Be back in 25 minutes.

You get the idea. Sure, I could use the alarm function for these things, but the count-down timer is more suited. Heck, watches these days have more processing power than the first IBM PC ever did. How hard would it be to add a timer function for watches?

Standards

Now, I'm not usually one to espouse standardization. However, some things I think NEED to be standardized. In the early days of the personal computer, power cords, and peripheral cables were all pretty much the same. I could take the power cord from an IBM PC and use it on a Compaq PC. Or even on an Okidata dot-matrix printer, or any number of devices. For desktop computers, that still remains the same. But if you look at laptop computers (and I have had hands-on with many), the power cords all have different connections. Even among laptops from the same brand, but different models.

Okay, maybe they all have different output voltages on their associated AC adapters. Couldn't they have made them to all conform to a standard voltage?

And remoted controls. Why does every bloody manufacturer have to have their own IR codes to perform the same stupid functions? I should be able to pick up any remote for any television and perform the same basic functions; Power On, Change Channels, Volume, Mute, Menu, 0-9, Up Down Left Right, and Select. I shouldn't have to buy a universal remote only to pick through a listing of manufacturer codes to find that NONE of them work.

And how about standard IR codes for the various multi-media devices that are out there, too? I've got a DVD player and a VCR recorder. All DVD players should have the same IR standards, too; Play, Stop, Pause, Fast Forward, Rewind, Skip Track (both ways), Disc Menu, Device Menu, 0-9, Up Down Left Right, and Select.

Sometimes it just drives me nuts.

The Hidden Room

Okay now, this is just too cool! The boy in every man would just love to have a hidden room. I know I would. The pictures in the article show a bookcase/door, and a staircase that hinges upward leading to a hidden room.

One of my pipe-dreams is to convert my unused pool in my backyard into a below ground library. It would be accessed by trap door in the floor of my computer room, down a descending staircase, through a short hallway, and into the library. Since the pool already exists (its dry), I would break out and dispose of the existing concrete. Then square up the walls and floor. Forms would have to be made, and reinforced concrete poured for the floor and walls. I'm not entirely sure how to form the ceiling, but it would have topsoil for a lawn, or maybe build it up a bit and have a shallow decorative pond or fountain. Hmm, that may prove to be a disaster in the making. Okay, I'll leave it as a lawn.

But that would be the ultimate, to have my own secret room.

I can dream, can't I?

The Sci-Fi Channel?

What is up with the Sci-Fi Channel? I've got two issues with them...

First of all, their "Sci-Fi Original Movies" are real stinkers. This first came to my attention when they came out with the movie "Raptor Island". I was really set for this one. Boy, was I horribly disappointed. I won't even touch on the script or the acting. The dinosaurs, computer generated, were horrible. The design was amateurish, the movement all wrong, and when they were shot with a variety of weapons, you'd see a fuzzy splash of blood. But no wound, and the creatures never even reacted to being shot. That was the first "Sci-Fi Original Movie" that I ever saw. I've seen 4 or 5 since then, and they've all been that bad or worse. I won't even bother with 'em anymore.

The second problem I've got with the Sci-Fi Channel is this wrestling thing. Did I miss something? Well sure, I know that showboat wrestling is completely scripted and choreographed, but I didn't think it qualified as science fiction. I just gotta shake my head at this.

Old Movies I Remember

I grew up in the Los Angeles area. One of the things I remember in the early to mid 60's was a television show on Friday nights. It was called "Chiller", and it showed old sci-fi and horror B-Movies. There was no host that I remember, just the opening Chiller sequence (dripping letters) and then the movie of the week. I first saw "House on Haunted Hill", "The Crawling Eye", and other classic horror movies.

There are a couple of movies that I remember from that time that I've never seen since and I can't remember the titles of...

The first one is a sci-fi flick about a spaceflight to either the moon or Mercury. I'm not sure which. The astronauts were beset upon by these "rock men" that seemed to reside in niches on rock/cliff faces. I also seem to remember that the astronauts pointed out that because there was no atmosphere, shadows were completely black. One of them demonstrated it by walking into a rock shadow, thereby completely disappearing.

The other movie was in the horror genre. The monster of this one was a walking tree with a knife embedded in it's chest. It seems that some native criminal was entombed in a hollow tree, and somehow he/it came back to life and animated the tree. At the end of the flick, the hero fired a rifle at the knife, forcing it into the monster's heart and killed it.

Can anyone out there point me to the proper titles of these old movies?

Q-Ray is Bogus!

It always seemed to me that false-advertising was illegal here in the US. Along with CortiSlim and magnet therapy, the Q-Ray Bracelet ranks right up there with snake-oil and quack medicine.

According to their own claim, "The Q-Ray Ionized Bracelet is made with Bio-Metal that offers a natural and effective method to increase one's bio-energy, vitality, and feelings of well-being". Now, they're either ignorant of what ionization is, or they're banking that its the public that is ignorant. And what the diddly ding-dong crap is "Bio-Metal"? Its pseudo sci-gibberish, that's what it is.

It finally took a U.S. District Judge to rule on the Q-Ray Bracelet claim. Other preposterous claims abound around the Q-Ray.

The really sad thing about this is that the general public is so easy to bilk and bamboozle. Critical thinking is just not their strong point.
And THEY know it!

I'm A Guinea Pig

My wife has been taking a whole slew of massage therapy classes from an outfit called Somatherapy. She actually got started in this after she was doing horse massage.

Anyway, she comes home from her classes and wants to try all the things she's learned on me. You'd think this would be a win-win for me. But I've had things done to me that no non-quiche eating male would ever request.

The swedish massage was pretty nice. But the salt and sugar scrubs are pretty abrasive. Its an exfoliation thing. I've come to the conclusion that I like my foliation, thank you very much. Then there's the clay and seaweed wraps. They're both pretty much the same thing... You either get this watered down clay mixture, or a nasty goo made from some kind of seaweed painted on you. The seaweed goo smells like a tide pool at low tide on a hot day. Phew! Then you get wrapped up in a sheet and mylar. Its your own mini sweat room. I layed there for 20 minutes wondering what was going to stink more, me or the seaweed.

The herbal wrap is almost the same thing, only you're covered in sheets that have been soaked in an herbal tea concoction, then mummified in the mylar again. At least with this one I got a peppermint-aloe facial. Egads, I feel so pretty.

Last night was a real topper. She gave me some kind of hot wax treatment. She got this electric tub thing that melts the special lavendar wax. Next thing I know, she's dipping my hands and feet in it like I was some kind of scented candle. Did I mention that the wax was melted and bloody HOT? I don't know about my feet, but my hands are still smooth 'n silky.

Don't ask to shake my hand. I'm not doing that until I can build up some callouses again

I'm Lucky, Too

Wow, what a week it has been. First I win a contest held by Gizmodo, and I'll be getting a 2gb SanDisk Cruzer Titanium flash drive. Then a co-worker was trying to get rid of an old safe she had that no longer worked.

I'LL TAKE IT!

...says I. Turns out it is an old (1986) hotel room safe. It no longer locked, the "key" (on top) no longer worked, and she had long since forgotten the combination. Hey, it looked like something fun to play with. Yeah, and it has a standard 110volt power cord.

The first thing I did was crack open the works in the door. I fiddled with it, pulled cords, poked at stuff, just basically trying to figure out what makes it work. Maybe I could spot what was wrong and even fix it.

Long story short, it took me about 40 minutes to bring it up to complete working order. So now I've got a very boring looking safe. Don't you think it needs something? I think it needs something. But what? This is a boring box that is in serious need of a modding.

I am open to any of your suggestions. Drop a comment here and give me your ideas.